Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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