I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
