I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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