I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
