we have officially lost it.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Randomize
