Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
