And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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