I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize