ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Its about making memories worth repressing
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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