I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Randomize
