sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I have demons in me.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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