So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
