dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
