Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize