have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
