i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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