a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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