So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
