Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
he puts the penis in happiness.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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