then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
that is very illegal...i love you.
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