OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
