theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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