It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
