we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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