After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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