I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
