I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
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