What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
