There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Small penises have feelings too.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
