Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize