with your own penis?
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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