what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
