wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
