is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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