there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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