I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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