Your tits are I can't wait for
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
