Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize