chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
