You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I cockslap morals
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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