so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
