Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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