Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
