I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
