I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
