I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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