Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
