Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
