My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
