I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
